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So tired of it all.

Posted , 18 users are following.

Fairy28
Fairy28

I know I'm on here a lot but I'm really starting to feel like I've truly had enough of all this, every damm day is the same. Can't sleep and when I do I wake up feeling so sick, I feel dizzy and wobbly most of the time, every bone aches, my hair has thinned, ive put weight on, I have no womb, ovaries, cervix everything's gone, no HRT due to migraines a lot, can't concentrate, anxiety and panic attacks, I feel so done in like im about to die most days - how much longer can my heart keep beating keeping this wrecked body going and what for just to keep suffering every day, it's nearly three years of this and it's getting no better - hubby doesn't understand or care what's the point if it's always gonna be like this. Might as well give up this is no life it's just misery every day with new symptoms all the time crying and feeling so sorry for myself - im not a woman anymore im just a thing.

2 likes, 55 replies

55 Replies

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  • sharcerv52408
    sharcerv52408 Fairy28

    Posted

    Have you tried meditation or relaxation techniques. Believe me they work. I have an app called "Calm" on my phone. Just keep telling yourself that every day you're getting closer to the end of these symptoms. Take care. My thoughts and prayers are with you dear.

    Xx

    • Fairy28
      Fairy28 sharcerv52408

      Posted

      Thank you I WILL try it. Do you really think things will get better one day ? X
    • sharcerv52408
      sharcerv52408 Fairy28

      Posted

      I know they will. I see older women all the time and they seem happy and carefree. I know they had to go through what we're going through and they're alive to tell about it and you will be too.
  • jamie50513
    jamie50513 Fairy28

    Posted

    Aww Lou,

    You are are a wonderful and strong woman. You have being doing this journey with no HRT and that takes a strong person. I wish I could give you a date when it will end, but just know that it will end. You will not be the same person that you was before this journey. You will have become an even more stronger, better person to have braved this journey the way you have. Your day to feeling better is coming. Just continue to hold on. ((Hugs))

    • Fairy28
      Fairy28 jamie50513

      Posted

      Thank you Jamie, your words have brought me to tears with your kindness but I'm being totally honest and my heart is racing again as I dread the long dark night to face yet another day dragging myself around feeling so ill. How can this ever get any better - will it ever ? Just to feel some Hope that one of the symptoms will go away - hospital says nothing wrong with me, heart, lungs, liver, all good - but they just don't get it my heart and soul are broken along with my body - it's so hard to explain to anyone just how I feel - the mental pain that breaks me every day - I feel castrated and empty, just can't explain . Trying to hold on to something but I don't know what and why, if this is it I don't want it 😰
    • jamie50513
      jamie50513 Fairy28

      Posted

      I understand and know exactly where you are coming from. It's hard to believe that you are fine when you physically feel ill and they don't understand the mental strain that it puts on you.
  • debbie12340
    debbie12340 Fairy28

    Posted

    Hi 🙋🏻 I feel your pain it's the pits isn't it ? Have you tried taking a good quality liquid Magnesium at all ? If not I really recommend you start. Helped me tremendously, especially sleep.

    Hugs,

    Deb x

    • Fairy28
      Fairy28 debbie12340

      Posted

      thank you - where can I get this from ? Is it just called liquid magnesium ? I can get some tomorrow x
    • debbie12340
      debbie12340 Fairy28

      Posted

      Hi Lou, sorry I've been asleep it's been the night time here ! I buy mine from Amazon, just search liquid magnesium and choose possibly the best rated one. I'm not sure if you can buy it at any shop ? Try it after your evening meal and I'm convinced you will soon be sleeping much better and be more relaxed.

      Deb x

    • debbie12340
      debbie12340

      Posted

      Hi again Lou,

      Sorry forgot to say use the word 'ionic' in your search so it's Ionic liquid magnesium you are looking for it's the best absorbing type. If you can do some research on Magnesium in general you will be amazed at all the health benefits.

      Deb x

  • sazzie42
    sazzie42 Fairy28

    Posted

    Hey hey.... You are not just a thing. Your a beautiful woman whose body is changing. It is like a roller coaster ride at the moment it sounds like it's a bit bumpy. Look in the mirror and tell yourself out loud your beautiful.

    My husbands has similar traits to yours on a rough day!!!! He just carries pocket tissues if we go out together as he has learnt I will need them at some point- that's if I dare go out!!

    Here to give you a peri hug x

    Sazzie42

    • Fairy28
      Fairy28 sazzie42

      Posted

      thank you, will try to hang on a bit longer - just so hard when I know tomorrow ( today ) will be the same old same old , hugs back x
    • TropicalVon69
      TropicalVon69 Fairy28

      Posted

      Hi Lou....I have just started taking maca.....has some great reviews, good for adrenals...

      Feel a little better for it

  • brendababy
    brendababy Fairy28

    Posted

    Hi Lou,could there be any chance that you could have developed ME or HPA axis as its called now

    I have ME and developed during a time of high stress/anxiety and burn out

    I was well for years but going into meno has brought all of the symptoms back 100% worse than ever

    If there's a possibility you could have this don't worry cos when you stop fearing your bodily sensations and symptoms and allow your hormones to settle then all of the symptoms will switch off

    I let the anxiety build up also like you and feel sometimes that I can't suffer another day, however, I just do what I can even when I'm dizzy/off balance, wobbly shaky legs, feeling faint, migraine, nausea and vomiting sometimes I try and just carry on try and do things slowly like showering, shopping with my hubby, going for a walk in the fresh air, what's the worst that can happen?

    Lose the fear and what's left, just some lousy bodily sensations

    If you feel like crying just cry, do what you want. I have developed a site stiff neck as well, don't know if it's peri or if I've held my neck stuff because of the balance problem but I've stopped caring about it now, fed up being scared this gives you back some control

    Please don't let these symptoms bring you down anymore, get up, brush yourself down and go out and do something nice, walk, go for a tea or coffee, visit the zoo anything that's not related to illness or Dr's etc

    I really hope you can find the strenghth it will be worth it, your body's sending you all of these symptoms to get your attention to take action and change your ways

    A big healing hug from me

    Brenda xx

    • sharcerv52408
      sharcerv52408 brendababy

      Posted

      I think I have learned to come to that place where I don't analyze every symptom and panic every time I feel something. I used to go to the doctor for every little thing. I've learned not to fear these symptoms but carry on with my daily routine. Keeping yourself busy as best you can is one way to keep your mind off of how you're feeling. I'm about to take a course in phlebotomy and get a part time job. That will hopefully help me focus my attention elsewhere.
    • Fairy28
      Fairy28 sharcerv52408

      Posted

      thank you I wish I could be like you but I'm going through the analysing every thing phase. What if this what if that - surely there must be something else wrong to make me feel this bad - I have needle like stabbing in my neck and ear plus throbbing ontop of everything else, so am thinking blocked artery now, this is how it's getting me - paranoid and focusing on every little thing it's driving me mad x
    • Fairy28
      Fairy28 brendababy

      Posted

      thank you Brenda deep down I think you maybe could be right - but I'm in such a deep phase of symptoms that's it's so hard to think of other things. - ive got so many pains and worries and now painful throbby neck so im analysing that and thinking the worse, im getting in a state over it all and can't bring myself out right now - yes the more I focus the worse it all is that's for sure, am I seeing and feeling things that arnt there or are they, I don't know I can't decide what's real and what isn't, but it feels real, I certainly could have developed something else, im going to look up ME now and see if my symptoms relate. Xx
    • brendababy
      brendababy Fairy28

      Posted

      Lou you really need to stop, you are making yourself miserable with noticing and worrying about every symptom and sensation you have

      Our hormones dictate how we feel we know that the change of life and the hormone fluctuation causes an imbalance, some of us have similar symptoms but we're all unique and cope in whatever way we can

      Anything you have suffered from before peri is magnified as you go through this, it can be terrible for some like us ladies on here I know what your going through believe me and your not imagining the symptoms but anxiety and worry can manifest lots of bodily sensations which creates more anxiety and so you end up in the loop of feeling constantly ill

      Why don't you set yourself a small challenge for one hour, let all of the symptoms be there but don't fear them, try and do something no matter how bad the symptom feels, you might be surprised how well you cope, this might be enough if you do it everyday to let your brain know that your in charge and your not in any danger

      I really do know what your going through it can be hell and you wonder how your going to change the situation but things can and will get better for you

      Please don't google symptoms either because your just keeping your mind on being ill all of the time you need to divert your thinking away from symptoms

      I hope to hear that your feeling a bit better soon, give us a shout if you need to talk

      Love

      Brenda X

    • brendababy
      brendababy sharcerv52408

      Posted

      Good for you Sharcerv, I wish you all the best for your future.

      Hugs

      Brenda xx

    • CCinCal
      CCinCal Fairy28

      Posted

      You're not alone Lou. I'm with you on analyzing every new pain and symptoms. I think we have to go through this phase to get to the next phase of not analyzing it. I'm talking, yelling, to my higher power a lot and just letting out the anger of it by scribbling with crayons on paper and crumpling it and throwing it on the floor. And punching pillows.

      I know it's SO hard. I am not even surviving but barely existing. I could barely pay bills online today and felt weepy and dizzy and nauseous all day.

      Try to get 5 min of sunshine outside ok? That helps a little. Will keep you in my prayers!!

      Xx

    • sharcerv52408
      sharcerv52408 Fairy28

      Posted

      I know how you feel. I really was about to lose my mind one day or at least it felt like it. I had such bad anxiety and my heart had such bad palpitations. I had already been to the hospital and had tests done and all was okay so I didn't want to run back to them again. They already think I'm a hypochondriac.
    • Fairy28
      Fairy28 brendababy

      Posted

      hello Brenda, just to let you know I did take your kind advice and Ive actually been for a walk today - not far just a short half hour in the sun and I can honestly say I liked it and made me breathe much better - it felt warm and safe. I felt so much better when I got back, I feel like I've made a start and can no longer do this to myself - torturing myself with bad thoughts 24/7. It's not much but it's a tiny tiny thing that could make a difference. I'll do it again tomorrow maybe 5 minutes longer. Just wanted you to know. Thank you xx
    • brendababy
      brendababy Fairy28

      Posted

      Oh Lou I'm so pleased for you. I knew you could do it and I knew it would help

      One little step at a time is all it takes to change things for you, no matter how bad you think the symptoms are keep going and they'll soon feel less important

      You've done brilliant and don't worry if you wake up and feel full of doom and gloom and feel you can't manage, I feel like that every morning but I know once I'm up and about this mood will lift

      I was out in the sunshine today with my husband, I was feeling off balance, shaky, fatigued and felt as if my head was someone else's lol but i just kept on going and I managed to do what I'd set out to do

      Keep in touch and keep setting yourself small challenges each day, things will soon get better for you

      Lots of love

      Brenda xx

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