Tearing during sex.

Just a quick update - I’m taking Estrodot patches and it’s stopped the tearing. Now I’m going to back off the patches and see if I can make my own Oestradiol and see why I’m low in it. 

Very bad condition 

Try  to use baby oil as lube just a small amount, otherwise can get super slippery... place it in the area where you usually get tear and also place some on your boyfriend. Pls Make sure to avoid certain position that might trigger to tearing. But most IMPORTANT make sure you are moist enough, foreplay as much as possible. Always clean your area (preferable shower after sex). Also very important pls check your soap....make sure to use a free glycerine soap for your privates, you can try pure olive oil soap by Kiss My Face.  Last thing, you should buy probiotics- (a natural good brand, preferable one that you keep in the refrigerator) Take them for about a month and your problem should go away. 

Hey everyone, I found something that works for me!

I stumbled across this post awhile back when I was researching the very same thing that has been happening to me for the past few years. I was tearing during sex, usually at the beginning, and usually at the bottom or about an inch inside. I tried everything as well... lube, extra foreplay, multiple (but worthless) trips to various gynecologists and even a urogynecologist. One of the gynos I visited suggested a dilator and using it prior to sex, increasing sizes gradually as the act is being prepared. This didn't really help (although the new device was nice). One day, after a painful, disappointing and fruitless session with my husband, he suggested that I use the dilator every other day. Not necessarily with him and not necessarily in a sexual way. I tried this for a few weeks and it helped, so I tried it every single day for a few weeks and it resulted in our first tear-less session in years. I've made it part of my daily routine now. I take 10 minutes a day and use the dilator with it's biggest option and plenty of lube. Sometimes I have fun with it but sometimes I just prop it up on a pillow and read a book. It hasn't cured the problem, but it's certainly decreased it's regularity and severity. Plus now I get 10 uninterrupted minutes a day all to myself because I'm doing what has become known as my "marital homework".

As far as the cause, I'm chalking it up to my vaginal lining weakening/thinning because of my age (almost 40!). I don't feel like it's anything to do with the size of my husband's penis, vaginal dryness, hormones or any of the other issues mentioned in other posts.

Anyways, it's been a tremendous life changer for us so I wanted to share. Would be curious to hear if anyone has experienced the same relief!

 

Although I’ve still not found a solution to this problem, my gyno did prescribe topical lidocaine ointment. It still tears during sex and I’m in pain the next few days until it heals but it at least makes sex possible. We still don’t do it often as I have to mentally prepare myself and think is the pain of being torn going to be worth it for the next few days. I also always make sure to take a sitz bath after to help clean the area if it gets torn. I have also recently started seeing a chiropractor who specializes in upper cervical care and they focus a lot on natural health and are exploring food sensitivity testing and healing of the gut. Its amazing to learn how much the upper cervical part of the spine & your gut has to do with the rest of your body. 

I honestly thought I was alone in this. Sadly reading all off these comments I am realizing there is probably no end in sight. I am miserable being intimate with my bf, sex now feels more like torture. I am tired of crying and complaining to him about it and live in fear that this is ultimately going to ruin my relationship, I'm always down now and feel defeated, all though I've learned that soaking in Epsom salt for about 20 minutes shortly after intercourse relieves my pain an heals the tears for me within a day, I just wish there was away to prevent it in the first place. Thanks for all the info ladies.

Please someone if you figure out the problem let me know lol. My current SO officially a month, but we have been having sex since September. We've been best friends for years. Since we started, it seemed I was good for once and then it was painful all other attempts. There's a s**t ton of foreplay, I'm wetter than Niagra falls and I even go down on him, so he's all wet and lubricated. But I still end up in pain. He is bigger than my past partners like thicker, but I refuse to accept that he's just too big for me because sex is important to both of us. I just started BC so I'm bleeding all the time so Dr. wont look down there. I've been tested for stds and there's no way it's herpes. We are both monogamous and clean. Doctor said yeast infection from the sounds of it and told me to buy monostat. Yeast infections have never cause this before.

Me too! I never had this problem until last 2-3 years. I am into natural healing. I feel a lot of medicines only mask a problem. I was reading an old time medical manual about frigid women and wondered could this be the problem because I was single for years when I never had this problem now I am married and I got to be honest I have a few hang ups. I was just wondering if any of the women here can talk about that. Could it be we are tensing up when it comes to sex. I mean now that I know I will probably tear I really tense up. But I think maybe I was tensing from other issues before. Could that be the cause? In this book it said the solution would be to go through a psychotherapy to address those issues. Any response would be great. I hate to think I'm frigid but if I'm honest I think I may be.