There is light at the end of the tunnel

hey reg .. no problems ... the idea,s of forums is to start with a topic and allow it to create other topics.. kind a like a free for all lol 

        things are still fine .... thats the key with opiate and alcohol recovery ... days can be boring and it can be hard to motivate yourself but its a uphill struggle ...

        what i do is think " do i want to return to opiate dependance ?" ..and within a millisecond the answer is "no" ..... basically when you get to my age ( 51 ) and been there done that normal life without opiates and alcohol actually seems not too bad ..... food tastes better and my interests are actually coming back 

        i allways go back to the old saying in the cult movie " trainspotting " .... which states "CHOOSE LIFE" ... its so true .. we get no second chances in this life and you need to grasp life and enjoy it ...

          great comments guys ... peace out to you all and hope you all find what your looking for 

Is there light? I'm now detoxed off subutex by far the worst detox of my life it's day 11 I feel so ill my limbs feel like lead zero energy every small task is mammoth please give me some tips on how to get through this cos the medical people haven't a clue I never want to relapse my life has been destroyed by subutex plse help anyone ??

I'm so so sorry that I can't help you & it's criminal that you're left to suffer by the so called Professionals who are there to supposedly help you!!!

I really wish there was something I could do to help you as the so called Professionals obviously aren't doing their jobs!!!

Keep on fighting sweetheart!!! :-( xxxx

To the moderators.

Can you please explain exactly WHY my post to Brian was deleted & exactly what it was I posted that was so very very wrong?????

Thank you.Ritchie

Thanks Ritchie but I'm so so weak I have 0 energy limbs feel like lead and mood crash so severe I'm a single mum and really really struggling now x sod these professionals let them take subutex for 11 years then let me know how it feels cos they haven't a clue they left Monday said your opiate free well done sorry we underprescribed your detox we will get it right for the next person. Words cannot express how I feel about them! !! Sorry to go on how's things with you in this bloody messed up world 😠??

Dear Moderators.

Again, can you please explain exactly What it was that I put in my post to Brianthesnail that was so wrong that it had to be deleted Please???????

THANK YOU

Never apologise my matey.

You have every right to rant about these screwed up so called professionals that you put all of your trust in!!

Doesn't it make you feel 110% better knowing that the next person that goes through this, won't feel as bad as you do! Yeah right!!!! Oooooh, look at that Pig flying over your house right now!!!!!!

Things with me, well, I got a call from PALS today that I complained too, I now have an appointment with the Pain clinic after there refusal to see me but, I've gotta wait 6 months for the appointment.

I have a phone call appointment with my GP tomorrow, if he refuses to give me any decent pain relief, I'll just tell him that I'll have to take it further then, as I'm not prepared to go through the next 6 months suffering in pain 24/7. Why should I be persecuted for something not my fault in the first place. Just because I put my trust in a GP that never once told me the dangers of what she was giving me!!!

You keep your chin up sweetheart, you will beat this now. You've come such a very long way now & I know you will beat it & get through it now.

Keep on fighting Sweetheart

You know where I am!!!

Ritchie xx

Dear Ritch,

I had a post held up for two days...I think it was because I was not giving "hypothetical" medical advice and the legal team needed to find a Merck pharmacological dictionary to see if I was doing anyting potentialy contra-indicated as I do not kow the complete medical file.

Or they could be morons.

Sorry to hear of your 6 month wait......(maybe ask to be put on a short notice cancellation list??????)

and to think they let whiney (not you) people in instead of you first.

At least you are on it. Good perserverance!

Good luck tomorrrow and if you want a list of questions for your GP let me know.

reg

Thank you reg.

I'll put it down to the moron I think!!

I've learnt to, even though it's a sad way of looking at it, just treat everyone as total idiots, if they prove not be, it's a bonus, if they are as you first thought then hey, you were right, no disappointment hey!!!

I hate it, I really do honestly hate it to look at it that way but, my experiences in life tells me , it's the best way to be. Isn't that very very sad reg?

I get along with everyone & anyone mate but, I'm just sick of people walking all over everyone just because they can. It's wrong. Very very wrong!!

Anyway reg,

Thanks for that mate.

Again, this morning it took me 20 minutes to walk what would normally take 5 minutes to walk.

I'm so very angry that, 7 or 8yrs ago, I went to my then Gp because I was in agony with my back.

After trying most medication without success, I refused to take what she offered me as Morphine, as the name really frightened me. With no explanation of what it was she then said ok, I'll try you on Oxycontin. Never having heard of it, I went along with it.

Having found out later that it was 2.5 x the strength of Morphine!!!!

The rest is history, 8yrs later, this drug that Purdue Pharma the manufacturers of Oxycontin have now been found $645million to date. Not one person who has suffered from taking it has received a single penny of this money.

I don't want their drug money!!!!!

I want them to admit exactly what's in the stuff & tell me Why, I used to be the life & soul of any party, happy go lucky, would be the one to cheer people up & make them laugh when they were down.

I want them to tell me why I am no longer that person since taking their non addictive drug, that has ruined my life!!

I used to play the guitar, it's sat in its case for 18months as I can't be bothered to get it out.

I want them to tell me why I used to love buying watches, polishing them up getting every scratch out & making them look better than brand new, being called the best watch seller on a certain website, why I still have loads of designer watches that need polishing, why I just can no longer bring myself to do it!!!

I'm now 49yrs old, I have worked damned hard from the age of 14yrs old when instead of playing football for my school, I would get up at 5.a.m every Saturday to go work on a market stall.

My Parents brought me up to work hard for what I wanted in life, that's what I did till 18months ago till I had these agonising pains in my back that left me unable to walk very far.

Now I'm being persecuted for one drug I was given for pain that I didn't like the side effects of, now, no one will give me anything to help my pain as they're frightened to. All because of Oxycontin where the reps of Purdue Pharma blatantly lied saying it was non addictive!!!

Now I'm supposed to suffer for the rest of my life in pain, just because of this one drug, where no one will say "here, we know what Oxycontin was, we know it wasn't your fault, try this, if you don't like it come back, we will try you on something else"

Has common sense in this very sad, Sick world really gone out the window????

Thanks reg

Ritchie

I so hate this world it's so so wrong I read your posts I cannot imagine living in so much pain and that poison oxytocin I've seen a Panorma programme about it it's wiped out parts of American these so called legal drug pushers god eat their own medicine then say it's non addictive let theme suffer the withdrawals and get no bloody help it makes me fume. You are a good brave man who deserves so much more I really really hope one day things are better for you ?

Don't you worry about me Tez please.

Just worry about getting yourself sorted Please!!!

I'm ok, I've learnt to cope & deal with it. There are far far more people worse than me that deserve the help.

It just shouldn't be like this in this day & age.

Just get yourself better matey please xx

It wiped out a whole, complete generation in Kentucky Tez where they named it "Hillbilly Heroin"

The sad thing is that Purdue Pharma have been in court more times than out of it & have been found a total of $645million.

The people who suffered havent had a Single Dime of that money, so where has it all gone exactly???????............. yes, EXACTLY!!!!

Where the hell has it gone 😠I'm struggling badly now still got physical symptoms and now the mental crash i don't know what to do 😣

:-(

Can't you ring your GP to see if there is anything they can help you with?

It's terrible how you're suffering xx

My GP treats me like a hopeless addict but really don't think their is anytime he can prescribe I contacted the drug team who put me on this subutex noone available and now it's weekend is it a good thing that I live in a small town and noone will sell me anything with codeine which wud cure some of this. Misery dreading the weekend ?😠😩😩

Tez

I feel so so bad for you as I've been there myself.

I thought that today. I had a hospital appointment & walked around to my parents as they took me to the appointment.

It's a 8minute walk from where I live, when I got there I was drenched in sweat & near enough collapsed through the pain in my back. The frustration is almost as bad as the pain!!!

I know what you mean saying it's the weekend, they can forget all about us again for 2 days!!

I'm really so so very sorry you're suffering with this. It's just so very wrong that they leave you to get on with it!!

Very wrong xx

I'm so sorry that your suffering yet you still take time to reach out to me. I'm now having bizarre thoughts about retaking codeine this is terrible I know and somewhat impossible as no chemist will serve me but I see my son having to watch his mum in bed most of the time.I'm going to try and stay up today but I'm like a invalid it's alll so wrong I need energy badly I hate this 😣😣😣😣

I hate that you're suffering like this. It shouldn't be happening in this day & age but, as we've said before, we just get thought of as junkies & get treated as such. It's just wrong.

Is there nothing at all anyone can advise you to take to help you at all?

I really would be tempted to ring 111 & ask them for advice sweetheart as you need help that youre not getting xx

sometimes it can be something trivial richie ..it picks up on links and also if you insert certain punchuation keys such as semi colons or right slash .... i think the moderators may use some kind of algorithm which picks up on these keys ... i know for a fact links are checked as some may contain links to either infected pages or unsuitable pages .... its the way of the internet ritchie ... ive had a few posts deleted in the past ....dont worry pal 

      im glad i did this post as its generated a good discussion and thats what a forum is about ... hope you doing well pal ....

      bri 

hi tez 

     sorry for the delay in answering .... in my case there is light at the end of the tunnel but at day 11 your still in the initial post detox phase .... its gonna be tough and you have 2 options ... stick with it or go back on subutex 

     this is how i thought .. if being off opiates is this bad then i may aswell go back on them .. but no . that means your a slave to opiates and they will rule your life forever 

     have you asked your gp/doctor for a vitamin B12 shot .. these are given to many recovering addicts and alcoholics ... and they do work ... it will give you some much needed energy but its not a solution .. you will still be tired a little but should feel better 

     what you need to remember is when taking opiates the high it gives you makes you do more things that you normally would .. also everyday worrys are not a problem .. however take the opiate "cushion" out of the equation and the everyday worrys are ten fold and your body and brain will react to zero opiates in your system .....

      however the time it takes to feel "normal" again varies from person to person .. also the length of time taking the opiate matters 

      but since you were taking opiates ( from what i remember ) around the same time period as me ( approx 8 yrs ) then you need to allow at least 4 to 5 months ... this will be challenging but look at it this way .... everyday you going to feel that little bit better and not worse ... granted you may have bad days but even i still get those ( mainly due to my slipped discs ) ... but it will get better 

        keep at it tez ... i look forward to seeing future posts on your recovery 

      take care .... bri xx

Thanks Brian!!

You would at least think that the moderators would at least have the decency to let me know exactly why they deleted my post when, I honestly cannot think what I put in the post to you that was so very wrong for them to delete it!!???

But, I guess that decency is a sad thing of the past now in this very sick, evil twisted world that we all live in Mate!!

If I can remember exactly what I posted Brian, I will type it all again, minus whatever it was that may have offended the moderators in such a very big way!!!

Take care mate

Ritchie

Tez,

Please try to take on board what Brian says as he has been there, done it, and got the T-shirt.

I know how you're suffering from the times I ran out of medication & went into withdrawals for days on end till I picked up my script & I felt "Normal" again. My God what a feeling that was, to feel that normal again but, I know now it was only "my kinda normal" & not the REAL normal that normal people feel!!

Only people who have been there & done this will know exactly what I mean from the "Normal" & the "Normal normal"

You have come such a very long way sweetheart. Don't give in. Stick at it my mate & you will soon turn the corner & come out the other end.

I know it's horrible. It's HORRIBLE. But you really can beat this. You're nearly there Sweetheart.

YOU CAN BEAT THIS!!!! Xxxxx

I'm sticking it out itso hard 😩

I know it is my mate.

Imagine real flu & I don't mean a cold that most people suffer from when they say they have the flu. I mean REAL Flu which puts you on your back, bed ridden, then x it by 20 plus, that's withdrawals for you!

It makes it worse for you with this heat!!

It was 33 degrees here at 17.30 tonight. Unreal. Don't give in matey. You will beat this xx

Small glimmer of hope today so hot just lounged in son's pool my god my aches and Arms feel free of pain ? still tummy problems and head but glimmer to share with you all ???

Brilliant!!!!

So very very pleased for ypu!!!

Hopefully you have turned a corner!!??!

And, you did this on your own with no help from those who should've helped you!!

Keep plodding on chick, you're a star!!!

Big up you!!!! xx

No the glimmer has gone my stomach is agony can't keep anything in dr won't give me b12 jab but if I cud drive 50 miles and pay 8pd cud get it what do you have to do to get some bloody help wen your trying so hard I feel like giving up but I can't I hate life 😣😣😣😣😣😣

Don't give up sweetheart please.

You will get there I promise. Every day is a day closer to being & feeling better.

I know exactly, exactly what you mean.

You try your best & it seems like there is no one that can, or more importantly really wants to help you!

This heat won't be helping you either.

When you're better, perhaps we should look into setting some sort of group up to demand that people who need help, actually get help instead of getting door after door after door slammed in their face & getting fobbed off every single time xx

I can't stand this constant battle with health so called professionals i need a shot of vitamin b12 I have 0 energy and not coping inclusion cambs after a long debate emailed my GP to give it to me go to make the apt snotty receptionist said no dr needs to see you oh his too busy he will ring you today if he refuses like he did after my last 2 detoxes I honestly feel I can't go on wat wud cost them more the jab or. Me relapsing which I think I'd rather top myself than do on top of this got bad mouth infections pain relief excruciatingly my limbs feel like lead choose life but wat life 😣😣😣😣😣😣😣

Tez,

I'm so very sorry sweetheart that you're going through this crap.

This country really does need to wake up & smell the coffee that they're creating the problems of here on in!!!!

People like you need help for God's sake, but you never EVER get the help that you need.

I beg you now Tez, PLEASE ring Release, they will speak to whoever they feel they need to speak to in order to help you get through this.

Tez, I beg you sweetheart. PLEASE RING RELEASE & RING THEM NOW!!!!!

You need help, they will help you as obviously the ones that should be helping you, obviously are not!!!!

Ring RELEASE PLEASE. THEY WILL HELP YOU!!!!

Please ring this number, I seriously would not be here now if it wasn't for them.

Ring them PLEASE!!!!!!!!!

02073242972

Thanks so much I will 😣

I'm seriously going downhill my stupid GP has made me have a bloodiest to see if I need the vitamin b12 jab it's a well known fact these tests are inconclusive why oh why wen I'm trying so hard no strengtheft to get in the bath can't stand much more if I had the money I'd jump in rehab wat hope is their how to people get through this i didnt ask to be put on subutex for a codeine addiction now I can't win 😣😣😣I pray for you theirs no help they say you have to get through the withdrawals I feel like my mind and body is broken and just seen as a hopeless addict the Dr's did this now they won't help 😣

:-(

It's so wrongTez.

As you know that's how I feel about the system. The old GP I had did the same thing now know one wants to know.

Did you ring Release on that number I have you? You can sign a declaration form if you have or know anyone with a printer & send it back the same day, they will act for you & talk to your GP.

These people are addiction specialists, not the NHS ones, they know there stuff even more than any GP does. They will know what you need & get it for you!

I feel so very bad for you because I've been there. It's the worst thing. You just need treating properly & you will start to feel some form of normality again!!

Please keep your chin up sweetheart. I know it's very hard & easy for me to say. If i was in your position now I would be on the phone to release. If you've rang them before, ring again.

I wouldn't be here now if it wasn't for them.

Ritchie xx

Hi Brian it's my 3rd week since detox off subutex and I'm struggling badly have 0 energy no motivation chronic depression I tried to get my GP to give me the b12 jab he wouldn't said my levels were fine does this jab help as soon desperate willing to pay for it have you got any tips for me please xx

Sorry if I've overtaken this thread with my misery coming off subutex 😣😣😣😣 I can't describe the suffering I'm going through its mental and physical torture I even wanted to end it all today relapse is not a option tomorrow I'm definitely ringing release it's my last bit of hope ???2 you all xx

Why is it met with sympathy about Ant and his prescrion addiction yes he can afford rehab wat about us and our stories overprescribed addiction medication then every door shut in our face trying to recover it's a 60 pencei jab my GP is refusing wat about your story Ritchie I think we need to go public wud we get help or doors slammed as we aren't celebs who puts people on 8mg of subutex for a codeine addiction and all that crap your on wat a cruel world 😠

Nobody wants to know Sweetheart.

It's just too much hassle for solicitors etc to plough through all that red tape etc etc etc.

For saying I was prescribed more than double the amount of legal heroin that I wasn't aware of at the time could be (or I would call it gross negligence) but solicitors only want an easy win.

Like I said, I would love someone to tell me exactly where that $645million went that Purdue Pharma were found in lawsuits, because I can guarantee you that not one family of someone that died or who's life was messed up by this stuff had seen a single dime or penny of it!!!!

This world is run by greed & that's it.

We have no chance & it's very very wrong.

Keep on fighting Sweetheart you'll get ther & if you haven't rung Release yet please please do. They will take so much of the stress you're feeling away from you & open the doors that we alone cannot!!!

Keep on fighting Tez xx

Tez

How are you matey????

Ritchie xxxx

Ritchie how you doing? ? I've been off subutex for 3 weeks now and felt every bloody minute and it's not getting better had hysterical crying outburst today just can't seem to function i feel like I need a short stay in pyscharist ward but have my son though he could stay with my parents but dont want any social service interference wat the hell is in that subutex wat makes people go mad and not function anyone got any advice I'm not relapsing but just so ill😣😣😣😣

I said exactly the same about Oxy Tez.

It messed my head up BIG time, my memory is now totally shot, (And to think i was an Operations manager) I'd have no chance of doing that job now!!!

Did you manage to call Release?

When all else failed they were there for me and I said I would drive the over 140miles down to London to thank them personally but, yet another problem from my Oxy days, I now suffer from severe central sleep apnoea, where I stop breathing over 80 times per hr in my sleep so the DVLA have revoked my driving licence.

But I would dearly love to thank them personally for everything they did to help me.

Another issue I have is "opiate induced hypergonad hypergonadism" in other words zero testosterone levels, again, according to the consultant, all down to the Oxycontin.i now have hormone replacement injections but no improvement as of yet!!

Purdue Pharma have a lot to answer for, yet no one will dare take them on. All I would love to know Is, what is in that rubbish that has totally destroyed my life so much?!!?!??!!!

I guess I, along with many thousands of others will never find out hey!!! xx

We must find out can't we get it on a national TV programme or something this is so so wrong I'm so sad you are going through this look at all the bloody positive sympathy Ant is getting for his tramadol addiction yet normal people like us are left suffering I wish we cud get a group going. I emailed release I just feel so embarrassed talking about my problem wat help could they get me i want my mind and body repaired my memory is also badly affected really bad have night terrors and left with a eating disorder dup to subutex inclusion cambs are a disgrace leaving clients they put on that crap subutex suffering I wish they had eaten their own medicine then tell me how they feel big hugs to you 🌹🌹🌹

You're right sweetheart. If they had been in your position they may try harder to help you. To just leave you in a mess is disgusting.

I didn't feel like talking to Release but, they were really great I promise. You just need to tell them what is happening with you, they will talk to the idiots that aren't helping you to get them to help you.

They will talk to your GP also.

Remember. Your GP knows nothing about these drugs & what they do to your body, the people at Release do.

Like I said, I was suicidal until I talked to them & the doors that were slammed shut on me, Release opened them for me.

Big hugs back at you matey xx

Wat idiots thought it was ok to dope me up with 8mg subutex for a mild codeine addiction ong I'm ranting as I'm not coping off the bloody poison I can't read watch TV have a conversation I've spiralled into just wanting to stay in bed and die😣😣😣😣😣😣

Tez.

Come on sweetheart!!!

I know you can beat this so PLEASE don't give in. You've got this. Yove come so far now. The people that have let you down shouldn't be doing that that job. End of. Please ring Release & talk to them to put something in place for you. Please!!! Xx

Thanks so much for keeping in touch i don't know you but you are helping with your words of encouragement I will be forever thankful. The man who answered my email from release wasn't there so ringing on Monday if I get through weekend I want to live but not like this 😣😣😣😣😣

You don't have to thank me Tez.

What you can do to thank me is ring Release on Monday Please.

The people there I dealt with were Claire & Dan. Both Brilliant people who will help you loads. Let Release help you & it will be your first step back to normality xxxxx

Okay for sure 👌🌹

Ritchie can I just ask what these people do as don't want social services involved or anything it's disgusting how inclusion have just left me they aren't professionals they havent a clue I wish I could get a TV programme to pick up both our stories then see what they have to say hugs buddy 🙋

I promise you they have nothing to do with social services. You have my word I promise you!!

They are a charity that help people addicted to drugs & all they do is help you when the so called Professionals who are there to help.......well, we both know how that turns out!!!

Every day you're suffering, when one phone call will not only put your mind at rest, they will help You!!!

I've been where you are Tez, do you honestly think I would tell you to contact someone that will actually hurt you even more than you're hurting now?

Please just trust me & please just ring them. They will help you!!

I'm not heartless. I know how you're suffering because I've been there. I wouldn't do that to my worst enemy, let alone someone, even though we've never met, I care about because I know exactly what you're going through!!

When I'm better I want to be able to help people who are where we are & have been. There is no way I would do anything to cause more pain than you're suffering already.

Please call them tomorrow, tell them how you're suffering & tell them who are supposed to be helping you but are not.

I promise You, you will not regret it & I don't accept a thank you either, I'm here to help not cause you even more pain!!

Ritchiexx

You have my heartfelt thanks i will be ringing them tomorrow as just had such a bad day. It's so nice to hear that robbie Williams is reaching out to ant saying wat a tough schedule his going to be having at the priory with classes private counselling and yoga omg try going through the worst detox and being left with nothing but to bring up you son try run a house normally. I too when recovered want to help people addicted to this hideous pain medication and left to try and get help on the NHS only to be put on something more toxic. Imagine wat robbie Williams could do with all his money does he want to help the unknown no just support a celebrity who can fund their own treatment. Sick world. Ritchie you are helping more than you ever know thankyou so much 💚🌹

I can't do this much longer I just can't I feel so bad I rang release but they said they would call me back I'm at breaking point now I don't want to go on 😣😣😣😣😣😣

Hi tez ...

     sorry ive not joined in this disscusion as much as i could ....you must be around week 4 at the moment and the way you feel is normal allthough this dosent help when your feeling like you do 

    basically all the chemicals in your brain such as seretonin and endorphins are working overtime ... the lack of seretonin can cause depression and tiredness and also gives you that "i cant be bothered" feeling ...these take time to adjust allthough a course of a ssri anti-depressant such as prozac may help ... however as i discovered trying to change the way you feel with medication may not work,allthough everyone is different 

            one thing i also experienced is resentment and hostility.... i also made myself worse when seeing pop stars like robbie williams getting treatment thinking why is he so different when im suffering .. however i now think "well i cant do anything about this so why worry,im only making myself worse "

           however being straight with your gp helps ... i went last week demanding a muscle relaxant for my thorasic slipped disc and was shocked when my gp said "no problem ,,would you like some valium" ... i said no,is there anything else .. and she then prescribed me baclofen .... prior to this she wouldnt give me anything except gabapentin ..

           personally and if i was your gp i would consider a low dose of valium ... this would at least calm you down and get you through the next month . however low dose would equate to 2mg  or 4mg max daily .. not enough to sedate you but enough to take the edge of paws ( post acute withdrawal symptoms ) ..

          things to avoid during paws is caffeine ( weak tea is ok ) .. and any energy drinks such as red bull and monster .. these are false stimulants and could actually make things worse ..  

          have you tried gabapentin ... this seems better during paws ( especially for me ) .. this is different to pregablin allthough one works for some people and the other works for others .... 

          you do need some more help .... i know how you feel and it makes you feel alone,frightened and with no reason to continue ...and if it makes you feel any better i battled through paws with a thorasic herniated disc ,,, my gp says the only reason i got through paws and withdrawal ( opiate reduction ) is because im mentally strong ... 12 years of army service created a strong mind and body ... but even so the post opiate stage is hard and will challenge anyone ..

           finally have you gone to your local drug service .. these people are responsible not only for your drug reduction but also for your after care and support ... they should be able to help you in some way .. release are again a support network and they do essentially the same job 

          i said from the start you need counselling ... you have ( like myself ) a good heart and only see the best in people .. but try to ignore reports of ant and his recovery ... who cares ... he will have the best support but guess what ...he will be back on booze and drugs when he leaves the priory knowing he has a bed there when he needs it .. waste of air people like this 

       be stronh tez ,,, i will be following your journey and praying things get better shortly 

            best wishes .. bri XX 

Thanks so much I'm just not strong as I was already on high dose antidepressants diazepan and pregablin whilst on subutex i know think these aren't working i do actually feel at breaking point I'm not ever relapsing I would rather die but have a smashing son to live for but his mum is broken. I rang release today but missed their call back they are ringing on Wednesday as for my local drugs team I hate them for putting me on this subutex but all they have offered is a Friday womens group 20 miles away. I so admire how you got through it i hope some day I can say the same god bless ?

Please try hang in there Tez.

If Release said they will ring you, they will ring you. But, if you feel as bad today, (sorry daft question!!) Ring them again today & tell them how desperate you are. I'm sure someone will talk to you.

Good luck xx

Ritchie read my last post to bri I've messed up i need help release never rang back I've messed up i am in agony but mental crash noone wants to help im lost 😣😣😣😣😣😣😣