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TURPs dirty little secret

Posted , 14 users are following.

kenneth_42676
kenneth_42676

You won’t ejaculate !

Most urologists won’t tell you that tho.

When you have a 27 year old wife who wants children it’s an important issue,this could cause some people to divorce.

My wife is heart broken and I feel like I’ve let her down and wouldn’t blame her for leaving me .

Get the facts guys on prostate procedures before it’s too late .

0 likes, 44 replies

44 Replies

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  • oldbuzzard
    oldbuzzard kenneth_42676

    Posted

    Suggesting that TURP is the only path forward is borderline malpractice in itself. There are several other procedures that along with a high likelihood of preserving ejaculation, don't require the risk of anesthesia, have much shorter recovery times and almost no chance of any permanent side effects. And most of the time they work as well as TURP, while not precluding more invasive procedures if they become necessary.

    Not sure if you're interested in a lawsuit, but if you can prove that there was no discussion of RE prior to surgery, you may well have a malpractice claim. At the very least, you should report this doc to the state medical association. IMO, she should lose her license to practice medicine.

    FWIW, there is probably a way to harvest your own sperm and your wife may well come around. Good luck. 

    • kenneth_42676
      kenneth_42676 oldbuzzard

      Posted

      I was told my prostate was to large for anything but TURP?

      At any rate it’s over now and I must live with it.

      I’m not interested in a lawsuit .

    • oldbuzzard
      oldbuzzard kenneth_42676

      Posted

      Again - probably borderline malpractice. Most of the noninvasive procedures don't have a size limit. Your doc obviously told you things that weren't true and withheld things that are.

      I get not wanting to sue. But if you can stomach it, at least report her to the state medical board in hopes of saving someone else from the same fate.

      How did she determine your prostate size and what was it?

    • kenneth1955
      kenneth1955 derek76

      Posted

      Derek I wonder if she even told him how big it was.  Or if she just said it was big and Turp was the only answer.  We will never know what went on in that room before the surgery.  I hope he heal and does well  Ken
  • kenneth1955
    kenneth1955 kenneth_42676

    Posted

    First of all I'm sorry for what you are going through.  I'm not yelling at you.  I feel your pain.  But you should have gone and got a second opinion and another thing you should have not gone to a women urologist.  They do not know how a man feels  they only know what they learn in books.  And it does happen There are some urologist that only talk a little about sex.  They will tell you all with be the same because when we get older they feel that we don't need the ejaculation. And they do not feel that it is a function.   Some make jokes.  But what done is done.  If you want you can go through the procedure to get the sperm because it is going backwards into the bladder or they can get some from the testicles.  If you wife loves you you can still have a baby.  It may not be the normal way but you can't give up hope.  Also you have not been the first man that have been through this the Urologist first concern is to help you pee.  Anything after that is not there problem.  I believe she did not tell you or she did not explain it right.  Good luck I hope all goes well for you  Ken

    • waveydavey
      waveydavey kenneth1955

      Posted

      Respectfully -  your response is insensitive and inappropriate. To comment on the shortcomings visa vie male patients  by a female urologist is particularly nonsensical. And for some patients choices  are limited . Therefore treatment formats and their consequences is not like reading product labels at the supermarket. Most of those who come to this forum know this all too well. To chastise members for their lack of options  and or sophistication lacks compassion and understanding. If we all knew before what this venue has taught us  since...
    • kenneth1955
      kenneth1955 waveydavey

      Posted

      I am sorry that you think so but.  We pick the doctor we feel is right for us.  But we all know we have been there where a doctor has not told as everything and we learn after the fact. I had a women doctor when I was 47 she was my GP She told me I had prostate cancer and I needed surgery.  After going to the Urologist and doing all the test and I mean all of them.  It turned out to be a prostate infection.  I change doctors.  Not saying all women doctors are bad.  I have one know she was my ears nose and throat doctor and she is great.  But I feel a man should have a male Urologist.  He knows how a man feels and that does help sometime. I am not trying to be dis respectful but I believe what Ken is saying.  We were not in that room when the procedure was talk about.  It is over and he will have to deal with it now bit will teach men to make sure you talk everything over with your doctor and any question you have to make sure before you have any procedure  Ken
    • lee56659
      lee56659 waveydavey

      Posted

      Not only was it insensitive and inappropriate, to lecture someone on what they should have done after the fact is insulting and condescending.  But if you've spent any amount of time on this forum, this is par for the course from this individual.  I think he means well but seems unable to grasp that this kind of response does no one any good.

    • kenneth1955
      kenneth1955 lee56659

      Posted

      Good evening Lee.  We can't do anything after the fact but maybe this will teach other men to talk and ask question with there doctors before they have a procedure.  I have been on here over 3 years and I have help many men and in contact still with most of them.  I may not say things all the time the way other people do but we are all on here to help when we can.  I feel sorry for Ken because of what happen but like he said he will just have to live with it.  Life goes on  I wish you all well  Ken 

    • kenneth_42676
      kenneth_42676 waveydavey

      Posted

      Thank you for saying that.

      This female urologist came HIGHY RECOMENDED by several other doctors that my wife practices with in her office, I didn’t pick her name out of the phone book .

      Personally I am done with this forum, to many know it alls and to many bullies.

      Thank all who were cordial to me including you sir .

    • derek76
      derek76 kenneth_42676

      Posted

      All the more reason for her to be straightforward with you. I can see that your wife's connection with the practice puts you in a difficult situation.

    • Pepasan
      Pepasan kenneth_42676

      Posted

      I don't blame you for turning away, given the way your question gave rise to debate you hadn't asked for! However, having seen, over the many months I've been on this forum, a number of original posters get some welcome advice and assistance, I hope you will try again if you have a need to get more reaction in the form of honest experience and ideas from the variety of responders who occasionally get it right and do at times offer genuine and valuable help and information.

      All the best to you.

    • derek76
      derek76 Pepasan

      Posted

      He told us that he had a five minute consultation and was told there was but one option for him. He did not tell us of any tests or examinations prior to that consultation which seems very strange and almost as if he did not tell the complete story.

      If his wife is in a medical practice it must surely have been a subject for her to discuss or look for information on.

      Of all conditions BPH is the one with the most procedures and poorest  outcomes.  

    • kenneth1955
      kenneth1955 derek76

      Posted

      Derek we will never know what happen in the room.  I believe him.  I wish him well and I did some research on retro ejaculation.  They are working on decongestant to help with retro.  A decongestants pill can cause the bladder neck to close. Also they say that if you have sex while the bladder is full it will stay closed and the ejaculation will go forward not backwards.  Just trying to help  If he tried this for a little while maybe they can have a baby the normal way.  He will just have to be careful.  God help us all  Ken
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