Body positivity: 7 daily habits for self-love and acceptance at any age

While body positivity and self-love are two distinct concepts, they share a common foundation bound by similar ideals.

As Thomas Banta, clinical mental health counsellor, Kentucky, USA explains: "Self-love is a broader concept than body positivity, and body positivity requires self-love. Both are essential aspects of self-esteem that substantially influence our actions."

What is body positivity?

Body positivity is about recognising and valuing your body's unique attributes and abilities, regardless of its shape and size. It's about feeling comfortable and confident in your appearance - appreciating your body for what it can do, not just what it looks like.

Dr Sarah Boss, Clinical Director of The Balance Rehab Clinic, Palma, Spain says: "The challenges of the modern world make the relationship between ourselves and our bodies even more complicated. We are constantly compelled to compare ourselves to the world around us - particularly online. Body trends and body pressure have never been more intense, especially on adolescents."

She adds that body-positive people embrace the idea that all bodies are beautiful regardless of society’s standards, judgements, or ideals.

What is self-love?

The concept of self-love goes beyond physical appearance. It encourages you to appreciate and respect who you are as a complete person. Self-love fosters a deeper connection with yourself that acknowledges your strengths and weaknesses.

Licensed marriage and family therapist Kori Hennessy, Minneapolis, USA explains that self-love focuses on accepting yourself as you are and taking loving actions towards yourself. This helps you to set healthy boundaries in relationships, feel confident - even when you make mistakes - and reflect honestly on your behaviour to make changes when they're needed.

What are the benefits of practising self-love?

Low self-esteem - whether related to your looks or your overall sense of self - can negatively affect your mental health. It may cause you to withdraw from social situations, avoid new experiences, and doubt your abilities. It could also lead to health conditions such as depression and anxiety.

"Self-love and body acceptance are transformative for overall wellbeing," says Tse. "People who embrace these values tend to maintain healthier relationships with themselves and others. Cultivating self-love can make you better equipped to manage stress, and pursue personal goals over societal expectations. Body acceptance can fuel a healthier relationship with food and preserve your self-esteem - especially as you age."

How to practice self-love

Embracing self-love and body positivity takes effort and patience. If you're struggling with insecurity, it's unrealistic to expect immediate change. However, there are daily practices you can take to encourage self-acceptance and gradually work towards feeling good about your body and your mind.

1. Embrace acceptance

You may find it hard to accept your weight, height and other aspects of your appearance. This can be particularly challenging when dealing with the natural changes your body experiences over time.

Dr Tirrell De Gannes, Licensed Clinical Psychologist, Thriving Center of Psychology, New York, USA says that embracing acceptance is the first step in acknowledging what your body can and can't do.

"Celebrate the things you like about yourself, and admit the areas you don't," he says. "Work on improving those aspects of yourself, while not being overly self-critical for not achieving your goals. In cases where you're unable to make improvements, spend time with others who are comfortable with their sense of self and try to learn from their perspectives."

Hennessy explains that when we work on acceptance, we become open to learning and experiencing new things about our bodies. For example - we might find sexual pleasure in unfamiliar and exciting ways, or discover new types of movement that we love.

"Focus on your body's ability to experience sensation, rather than ruminating on how we are perceived by others," she suggests.

2. Challenge convention

The desire for self-improvement can be hindered by societal expectations that often lead to feelings of inadequacy. Overly critical self-talk and the desire to meet these - often unrealistic - expectations can hinder your journey toward body acceptance and self-love.

Banta says: "Learn to be present. Notice when these unhelpful thinking patterns arise, and be honest about whether or not they are moving us toward our goals and values. When they are not, draw on your strengths to empower you to move forward. We are always better off working from our strengths than our weaknesses. Positive action starts with self-love, and you deserve compassion from yourself."

Boss explains that the only way to change society's conceptions and assumptions is to educate. When we talk about how different our bodies are in a positive light, we expand our collective perceptions of what a body should - or shouldn't - look like.

"In the same way you would never shame a baby’s body for growing and changing, we should not judge adults for growing and changing," she says. "Our bodies are meant to go through transitions - it’s part of life. We should embrace this positively and love our bodies at every stage."

3. Be kind to your body

Nurturing self-love requires treating your body with kindness at every life stage.

"Body positivity helps us to treat our body with kindness," says Hennessy. "Take good care of it through healthy eating, regular movement and physically pleasurable experiences."

4. Limit your exposure to social media

Exposure to unrealistic body images in media can increase your insecurities about your own body and society's unrealistic expectations.

"Seeing curated images of others - even when we know it's not totally real - has an impact," says Hennessy. "We end up comparing ourselves to others, which is the perfect recipe for lowering self-esteem."

De Gannes suggests decreasing your exposure to social media and following more people with similar physical builds, shared mentality, and those who have worked through the issues you're facing.

"Surround yourself with people who lead by example," he says.

5. Create a self-love routine

We sometimes turn to retail therapy when we're feeling low on self-esteem. However, all too often, we realise this behaviour doesn't tackle the root cause of our issues.

Hennessy suggests you avoid using shopping as a way to feel good about yourself.

"When we challenge ourselves to reduce consumption, we learn that things - especially clothes and beauty products - are not the key to happiness," she says. "It's in our relationship with ourselves and others where true contentment lies."

She recommends instead creating healthy habits that focus on self-love and body positivity.

"We can take actions of love towards our body, even when we don't feel it," she says. "But if we practice acts of love towards ourselves daily, we'll slowly begin to feel we are worthy of it."

6. Find common ground

It's not just adults who struggle with body acceptance. Everyone experiences physical and emotional changes that can make it difficult to embrace their bodies at any age.

Tse says: "For instance, adolescence brings a whirlwind of changes that can scramble self-perception. Teenagers in particular can be bewildered by the hormonal shifts that impact their body shape. Women in post-pregnancy often perceive their bodies with discomfort, and people of older age might grapple with their physical limitations.

By sharing stories and emphasising our abilities instead of deficits, we may find peace in our changing bodies. Each stage demands a mindful approach tailored to individual needs, fostering acceptance through collective compassion and understanding."

7. Create a brighter future

It's common knowledge that the past can influence the future. Children often follow their parents' example, so exposure to negative self-talk can negatively shape their own self-perception.

Banta says we can change negative thought patterns and cultivate a positive body image, alongside self-love.

"When you have a negative thought about your body, recognise that thought, and ask yourself, Would I say this to my friend? Or my child?".

This question is an excellent check engine light for unhelpful thought patterns. We deserve the same amount of compassion that we offer to others in our lives."

He concludes by saying: "If we don't accept that it's ok for our bodies to alter over time, we will continue to struggle through different phases of life that should be normalised."

Self-love and body positivity are crucial for building healthy self-esteem. While imperfections are a natural part of life, it’s important to embrace who we are and recognise the changes our bodies experience. Accepting these transitions is key to fostering a positive relationship with ourselves.