
What are relationships anyway?
Intimate, work, play, family, nature or beyond - how important are your relationships?
Authored by Thomas Andrew Porteus, MBCSOriginally published 31 Dec 2025
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In this series:Me and myselfSurviving holidays
Relationships – what are they? We often think of relationships as intimate with a partner and yet we actually have hundreds of relationships with friends, family, at work, at play even with nature and beyond.
Clare and Aileen kick off the season by discussing the breadth of relationships.
What Are Relationships Anyway?
When we talk about relationships, we usually mean one thing: an intimate, sexual partnership. But in this opening episode of the new season, Clare and Aileen gently dismantle that assumption and widen the lens.
They explore the many kinds of relationships that shape our lives - friendships, family, work, place, community, nature and the relationship we have with ourselves - and why narrowing relationships to romance alone can leave people feeling diminished or less than.
The conversation moves through the hidden hierarchies of friendship (from childhood best friends to adult jealousy), the emotional weight of relationships we don’t choose, and the powerful patterns laid down in our families of origin that quietly replay across our lives. Clare and Aileen reflect on how early dynamics become relational blueprints, often operating beneath our awareness.
A central thread is the relationship with self, not as a slogan, but as a lived, moment-by-moment experience. They talk candidly about being out of the body, stuck in the past or future, and what it means to truly check in with yourself. Through theatre, therapy and lived experience, they explore relationship as something that can exist not only between people, but within us - heart and head, care and control, belonging and exclusion.
Thoughtful, curious and wide-ranging, this episode sets the tone for the season by asking a deceptively simple question: what actually makes something a relationship? and what becomes possible when we stop abandoning ourselves and each other.
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From bliss to blame
Have you ever found yourself thinking, ‘What on earth was I doing? This person is all wrong for me’, when only a few months ago they seemed perfect? How did that feeling of bliss when you’re finishing each other’s sentences and laughing at the same jokes turn to irritation, resentment and blaming them for everything that’s wrong? Clare and Aileen help you understand the natural cycle from falling-in-love bliss to relationship blame, why it happens, and how to navigate your way through it.
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About the authorView full bio

Thomas Andrew Porteus, MBCS
HealthTech
MBCS
Thomas writes to inform, inspire, and equip practice leaders and health professionals navigating change, drawing on two decades of hands-on work across the UK health system.
Article history
The information on this page is peer reviewed by qualified clinicians.
Article also available in English, German, Spanish, French, Italian, Portuguese, Hindi, Hebrew, Arabic, and Swedish.
31 Dec 2025 | Originally published
Authored by:
Thomas Andrew Porteus, MBCS
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